My coach and colleague Steve Chandler, who founded the Wealth Warrior Movement, gave me a lot of the language for this entry. It’s one of those, “I couldn’t have said it better myself” things.
Most professionals are taught to “prospect” — to market themselves. They put in long hours and good money on lead lists, websites and other marketing activities and they notice that nothing is happening. They aren't getting clients.
I have been fortunate enough to learn why prospecting and marketing isn't working for them. My own coaches, Steve and Rich, have worked with me on how to get clients. They constantly remind me to slow down with each person I talk with and practice serving and creating client relationships
based on service. I now almost always have most of the clients I ever want or need.
It comes down to whether clients and prospective clients sense that you are serving them or serving yourself. Are you giving or getting? Most of the professionals focused all day on what they can get are not getting much of anything. Those focused on what they can give are getting a lot.
The scenario based on getting works like this:
The professional meets with a prospect and begins a manipulation. He might start in with passive aggressive verbal maneuvering in an attempt to make working with him look attractive to the prospect, and he end the conversation with some kind of awkward request or question. And the prospect almost always says, "Let me think about it.”
And the primary reason for the push back is that there’s been no actual service from which they can determine the value of your offer. You gave very little and now you want a contract to keep on doing the same. I would need some time to think about that.
That's the world of get. Sound familiar? Getting doesn't get it. The world of I want is a repulsive world to a prospective client. It pushes people away.
That's one reason why marketing and mass sales efforts — along with old style sales techniques and strategies — are not working for many professionals. Every communication is a get communication and between every line of copy or manipulative
statement is I want! I want! I want your money!
Another reason the get approach isn’t working is that it’s uncomfortable for the professional to go through this routine every day.; So even if she’s telling herself, "I've got to do my sales today. I've got to get a client. I don't have any money!" her subconscious is saying, "I understand, but let's procrastinate on this one. Just for today. Just put it off for today. You can sell tomorrow when you feel better and can better withstand the pain of it."
In order for these professionals to become prosperous, they would have to stop marketing to their prospective clients and, instead, slow down and start serving them.
The world of give is very different. Prospective clients feel that you’re serving them
and when it’s time for you to leave, the urge to continue what you started with them is strong.
In the give world, when you talk about your fees, prospects already have a sense that you are worth the money and they have an urge to continue working with you.
If you were taught to live in the get world and find that it’s not working — or you’re not doing the activities you know you need to do to keep things going — it’s time to move to the give world. Try it, and see what happens.