Get thrown outBlog added by Sandy Schussel on November 30, 2012
Sandy Schussel

Sandy Schussel

Princeton, NJ

Joined: December 10, 2011

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If you’re ready to play a bigger game, work on getting yourself thrown out of all the best places until you belong where you want to be.

My coach, Rich Litvin, emailed me recently to share a story from his own life that I wanted to pass along to you. Here's what he wrote:

Last month, I told my coach, Steve Hardison, that I am ready to play a much bigger game. So, he asked me, "Who do you want to coach?"

A name came immediately to my mind, but … my coach scares me. He scares me because nothing will ever stop him. And that helps me to see all the "buts" I put in the way of achieving what I say I want. So, I took a deep breath and at last replied: “I'd love to coach the British comedian, Russell Brand.”

And then I recalled that he had a show going up in LA that evening. As I shared this with Steve, he said simply: "You have to go."

I got on line at the Phoenix Airport and found that there was one ticket left to Los Angeles. I purchased it immediately.

When I landed at LAX, I jumped in a taxi and raced to the event. I showed up at exactly 8 PM, and was, literally, the last person to arrive.

While I was speaking to the guy at the Will Call desk, I noticed an all-access pass lying right there in front of me. My heart began to race, because I thought, all I need to do is pick it up and I can walk straight inside, backstage, wherever I want.

But I couldn't make myself do it. I felt fear and I heard all the warning voices in my head. I hesitated.

So instead, I entered the theater with my purchased ticket. I managed to find a seat in the second row, directly in front of Gene Simmons, the lead singer of the band KISS.

As the show ended, Gene Simmons stood up and walked straight through a side door to the back of the stage. That door was right next to my seat, and I knew that it would be easy to just slip through there with him.

But I couldn't make myself do it. I felt fear and I heard all the warning voices in my head, saying things like: Russell Brand has just finished a gig. He'll be so hyped up right now that there's no way he'll want to speak to someone he doesn't even know. And you don't enroll strangers into coaching by telling them you want to coach them, do you?

And I hesitated until the moment was lost.
A week later, I was speaking with my friend, Sean Stephenson, the author of
 "Get Off Your 'But': How to End Self-Sabotage and Stand Up for Yourself." Sean has a rare bone disorder and was expected to die at birth. He reached a height of only three feet, suffered more than 200 bone fractures by the time he was eighteen years old, and is permanently confined to a wheelchair. Sean has faced innumerable reasons to give up and has had endless opportunities to embrace self-pity.

Yet, he has lived to become a motivational speaker and author, and counts among his friends Bill Clinton, Tony Robbins and Richard Branson.

I told Sean my story and then he shared one of his own with me:

A few years back, Sean was in the audience for a conference of the National Speaker's Association. At the end of the event, in the next room, there was a private dinner being held amongst 15 of the world's very best speakers. As the event space emptied, Sean said to his dad, who was pushing his wheelchair, "Take me in there, Dad."

His dad said, "What are you talking about? That's a private engagement. You can't go in there. You're not invited."

Sean replied: "Just do it, Dad. Push me in."

They entered the room and Sean proceeded to dine with these world-class speakers. And no one even questioned his being there.

As he finished his story, Sean looked me in the eyes and said, "Do you know the difference between our two stories?"

I paused and waited for him to tell me.

"I was trying to get thrown out."

I took on a new sense of my mission that day :My only job is to get thrown out.

If you’re ready to play a bigger game, work on getting yourself thrown out of all the best places until you belong where you want to be. Let nothing stop you.
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